Monday, August 28, 2006

Off-topic: Shitty soft rock and commerce

Soft rock of the female vocalist kind is annoying. Extremely annoying. For the past twenty years or so, we've been force-marched down the sonic trail blazed by Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey et. al; a trail of third-party singers spewing second-rate songs. A trail of formula schlock that's all constructed exactly the same, has the same obligatory modulation in the same obligatory place, with the same schmaltzy saccharine lyric themes. It certainly isn't rock, nor is the high-frequency shrieking particularly "soft."

OK, if you like this shit (and incidentally, if you do, you're wrong and you have por taste), that's fine.

BUT WHY IS IT ACCEPTED AS THE NORM IN THE WORPLACE AND IN PLACES OF COMMERCE!?!?!?!

Why do I have to deal with this crap in office environments? Why is it more professional than classical, jazz, or for that matter, metal? Moreover, why, when I'm sitting at a small mom-and-pop diner, where the owner has complete control over what plays in his store, am I forced to try and enjoy my spinach and feta omelette while some banshee-voiced hussy vomits overproduced garbage into my ears?

I am calling a personal boycott. I will not patronize establishments that play "soothing" soft rock radio at me. Silence is preferable. Good taste is even better. Sorry, I am unable to tune it out, and I know I sound like MattD, but that's where I stand. Hey, stick it, Mariah.

-Mark

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